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Becoming the Patient Parent
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Patience is one of the most sought after traits in the parenting world. Some parents are born with the trait and some have to learn how to be a patient parent. While many parents believe the worst of the trouble will occur around the toddler years, it is actually the tween and teenage years that create the most struggles between children and their parents. These years are quick to come and seem like a lifetime to live through. With a little patience, however, the time can be one of learning and friendship.
The most important aspect of being a patient parent is ironically patience. In order to learn how to deal with stressful situations without flying off the handle, parents will need to practice a few areas that are common stress points between parents and their children.
· Open the doors of communication. When a parent asks a child to talk to them about their lives or something that may be bothering them, there is nothing worse than choosing the path of arguing or raising your voice. The lines of communication between children and their parents are based upon trust. The child needs to trust they can tell their parent anything without being judged and the parent needs to understand that yelling will simply close the lines of communication.
· Stay calm. This may seem like an inevitable pointer, but many parents simply do not understand what the term “calm” refers to. A raised voice, twisted expression or even of sign can make the child immediately feel as those they cannot talk to you about the events occurring in their lives. Your child is the only one who can allow you into their world, burning the bridge of their trust because you overreacted is not worth the lack of knowledge you will gain.
· Expect the unexpected. This step is especially important for parents of small children. When attempting to take small children into new situations that may require them to be calm and sit for longer periods of time, expect them to act differently than they have ever acted before. Potty trained kids may wet their pants, kids normally into drawing may scream at the sight of a crayon. Instead of leaving the situation or scolding the child, try to understand things from their point of view. At home, they are allowed to play and have fun. Here they are told not to do the things they love. Instead of getting angry, prepare for the situation. Bring snacks, drinks, a change of clothes and a backpack full of games and new toys still in the wrapper.
· Plan for the expected. Again for the parents of younger children, planning ahead can solve many stressful problems that may tax your patience in public and private situations. When going out make sure you are able to follow your child’s routine. When a child eats, drinks and sleeps at the same time every day, going out of the home will not change that. Packing snacks and a pillow will help your child to stay on routine and lessen the chance of a fit while out of the home.
The relationship you have with your child will center itself on the patience you have with them on a daily basis. This patience will teach them you are not just a parent, but their friend. It will allow you to venture out of the home even if your toddler is on a strict routine. And, better yet, it will reduce the stress levels in the home and that is healthy for mom, dad and the kids.
© NowChic.com
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